Allowing The Power of an Opinion

One thing I had to learn during this time of transition and change was that for son's/children/mentee's to grow they needed a platform of expression.

I began my fathering with a idea that 'children' were meant to be seen and not heard. Of course I learnt that from my parents and others that came from the same culture. But I soon learnt that the Heavenly Father loves our honesty and wants us to express our hearts before Him.

Hey the Lord is not surprised by your opinions and utterances. He knows your heart before you do. Who knows the thoughts of man better than the spirit that is in man (1 Cor2:11). And yet He allows us to be who we are because He made us this way. Don't we try and mold people to our way because that's the way it has always been done before?

Someone taught me this principle: Consider all the facts; Make a single-minded decision; And settle it with finality; And live with consequences.

I began to teach my children and others around me this principle. because as we deliberate and halt between 2 opinions or places, we are double-minded and inactive and passive and the book of James tells us we are unstable in ALL our ways. We need to learn to make a single-minded decision and learn that decisions have consequences.

So, as part of their maturing, I began to allow my children to 'speak their mind' as such;to share the perspective in things, topics; to make their own decisions about things, but advising them to consider the consequences. I even found I had been taking the power to grow away from the members of our church by not allowing them to decide for themselves what God's will was for them. I would have my own agenda and idea of what they 'needed' and what was the Lord's will for them. Shame on me!

Empowering, growth, maturity means that we are allowed the responsibility of making the choices that affect and influence our destinies.

Have you noticed that in the book of Acts we told things happened but we are never given a 5 or 10 point plan or instruction on how to do the same thing. I believe it's because the Holy spirit wanted us to 'find' our what works for us; to make the decisions and choices that would bring about the same Holy Spirit inspired results.
Have you noticed how the Heavenly Father never 'forces' or coerces you to do something but says:"I set before you.. Choose, that you may live".

It takes patience and maturity on behalf of the father-mentor to 'listen' to the mentee and not constantly want to direct him. I had to deal with that in my own heart over and over. As a mentor-father are there times to guide and direct? Absolutely! But we should always have the mentee's/child's/son's maturity and empowerment in mind.

Responsibility is part of growth.

Wisdom

A wise servant will rule over a son who causes shame,
And will share an inheritance among the brothers.
Prov 17:2

What does a "son" do that causes shame?
1. Prov 10:5 says that he sleeps in harvest.
He is not diligent to make the most of favourable times, when he should be making the most of his opportunities, whatever they may be, he rather chooses to 'shut down'. Never neglect the opportunities that are afforded you. Be wise.

2. Prov 19:26 says he "mistreats" his father and "chases away" his mother.
Mistreat-It means to ill-treat, mishandle, abuse, ill-use, ill-treat.
God puts great emphasis on the place, authority and respect of fathers. Its not always how perfect or wonderful he is, but purely the fact that he is 'father'. Never let your father (natural, spiritual or mentor) ever lose his place in your life. Mistreat really is the 'way' you handle him, the 'way' you approach him and your attitude toward him.
To "chase away" implies a driving away through intimidation or force.
Mothers are the bond of the family, the atmosphere creators, the tender part of the family, the affection and nest-er. It would mean to despise her that sets the moral tone of the home and your life. To despise her would be to despise your own moral values.

King Solomon stated that a wise bond slave would rule over ( have dominion, govern and reign over) a son who causes shame. Even though the son is the rightful heir to the all, but now he positions himself in a place where the wise govern him.
However, a wise servant...
(Wise:
A primitive root; to be (causeatively make or act) circumspect and hence intelligent: - consider, expert, instruct, prosper, (deal) prudent (-ly), (give) skill (-ful), have good success, teach, (have, make to) understand (-ing), wisdom, (be, behave self, consider, make) wise (-ly), guide wittingly.)
...will take his place and find himself in a place of dominion and rulership and goverment.
You see wisdom is :

• being circumspect
• being considerate
• being expert
• instructed
• prosperous
• prudent
• skillful
• successful
• taught
• and understanding

Even a wise servant-bond slave-who acts wisely, even though he doesn't have a natural place in the inheritance of the son, will take a place in that inheritance because of his wisdom.

...And will share an inheritance among the bothers.

Watch you don't lose what could be yours because you don't handle 'mom' and 'dad' properly.

And be wise, regardles of whether you think you deserve it or not, it will bring into rulership and dominion